That's my boy!

Today the entire family partook in the Be Well Walk (key here is WALK), on Lady Bird Lake.

This is what Lukas felt was appropriate attire for the 3.65 trek:

Lukas finished the "race" wearing a bike helmet, soccer jersey and chin guards. And I'm happy (yet a bit concerned) to report that his true competitive spirit was alive & well. Each time someone walked past us, he would say, "Mommy we have to go faster, the people are passing us".

He wore the helmet all the way home.

And he....scores!!!

Let's start by stating the obvious: I love sports. Always have.

It's no wonder days like today leave such lasting impressions on me.

Today, Lukas had his first soccer game -- while his big brother was off taking his SAT.

And while I thought I had accepted long ago not to approach any kids' sport with expectations, it appears the lesson was not fully learned.

See, when C was Lukas' age, he too played soccer. Going into it, I imagined that my C would end up loving this game as much as I do. But when dandelions captured his attention more than the ball rolling by, I knew we were in trouble. He played a couple of seasons --always happy to join his friends but never playing with his heart in it-- before calling it quits. I can't say I wasn't sad, but I also respected that it just wasn't for him.

When a few years later C's tennis coach said he was impressed with my little boy's natural talents, I once again let my imagination run free. But it wouldn't be.  C was more interested in betting his best friend that his tennis ball could go highest, instead of working on his form. Tennis met its doom.

Thanks to these sports, I thought I'd learned to just" go with the flow". I thought I became the parent that allowed to have my kid tell me what he was interested in and move on when he said he just wasn't "into it" anymore. That's how I got through C's baseball, basketball and football seasons.

This morning, because Lukas (as we all know) can at times border on being anti-social, I had a glimmer of hope that he would like soccer, but I expected the very worst. I wasn't prepared for what happened.

The day started as most mornings at the SantaCruz-Parra home: Lukas fought me on getting out of the house and whined that he didn't want to play soccer. The more I tried to help him imagine fun and cool scenarios, the more he protested.

He left me no choice, so I did what any good parent would do: I bribed him one "Ben 10 Echo Echo" toy if he would just go watch his teammates.

The night before, Juan and I had taken Lukas to Academy to get him shoes, socks and chin guards. It wasn't an easy task, but we got out of there with all the supplies we thought Lukas would need for his first game. This morning, Lukas wanted nothing to do with any of it -- but he wanted that toy, so he agreed to get in the car, dressed, with no shoes.

Just like the days leading to today, our conversations in the car were about how excited we were to see him play and how his friends were waiting for him. He sat in his carseat silently. 

Once we arrived to the fields, he saw a small girl around his age in full soccer gear. He immediately asked that I put on his shoes and socks...and his chin guards. Within seconds of getting one foot ready, he wanted it all off.

I chose to compromise. He wore his regular shoes and the long soccer socks. No guards.

We quickly found his coach Sam, who is also Lukas' pre-school teacher & the only reason we dreamed of getting Lukas into soccer this year. This brought a smile to Lukas's face. Our next hurdled came in the form of absent friends. Lukas repeated over and over that he didn't want to be there and wanted to go home. Nothing Sam said changed his mind.

Lucky for all of us Joaquin, Lukas' best friend, arrived soon after. Within seconds of his arrival, the two buddies were in front of the practice goal, shooting and encouraging one another. My heart was happy. Lukas was happy.

Still, I panicked a little when Sam said it was time to move over to the playing field. It was a few minutes before the game. But Lukas followed Sam and his teammates with no reservation.

The 50 minutes of playtime (these tykes take lots of breaks) were filled with plenty of emotions for him:
-- He was so happy to be on the field, that he danced.
-- He was upset because he wanted water.
-- He was excited because he and Joaquin got to run after the ball together.
-- He was frustrated because he just couldn't understand why he couldn't keep making goals... Yes, he scored a goal!

In retrospect, I guess all were within a normal range of emotions and part of a day's work for a kiddo who only turned 4 on Monday. (Happy birthday once again Lukas!) 

Nothing I 'expected' for Lukas' first game happened for the reasons I expected. He had a great time (not a miserable one, like I thought) and his breakdown came from a lack of goals, not from wanting to leave.

I love that I was so wrong. Maybe this is a reminder go back to "going with the flow".

Photos: 
This was taken after his goal. I know you're wondering so I'll address it: Lukas was the only one without jersey because he joined the league late and didn't get his shirt until after the game. 

Lukas, center, and his best buddy Joaquin, right, had a blast playing together.

LPs first haircut

Yes, I was THAT mom.

Lukas will be 4... FOUR.. this month and it was only until last month that he experienced his first haircut. Yes. Really.

He was great throughout the actual process, though he was mad at me for days when he realized that his long hair was gone forever. Days later he touched his head, combed his fingers through his hair and cried, "I don't want haircut!". It broke my heart.

 I don't miss complete strangers mistaking my son for a girl, but I do miss his skater boy look.

Here are before, during and after photos:

BEFORE:

HAS NO CLUE WHAT IS GOING TO HAPPEN:

REALIZES HAIR IS GONE AND REFUSES TO TAKE A PICTURE:

The fam goes to Florida

This summer we did something we've never done before: took a family vacation.
Four families. Parents and kids totaled 15 under one HUGE roof.
As crazy as it might sound, it was one of the best vacations I've ever taken. To be surrounded by my sisters, my nieces, my brother-in-laws, my boys and the ocean was what my soul had long needed.
None of us had ever been to the "Emerald Coast" before but we were all eager to experience the white sandy beaches and the turquoise waters we'd only seen in photographs.... It was a big disappointment to find that we'd reach the beaches during the "seaweed" season. Needless to say, the water was far from blue but instead green --and not pretty green -- and full off slimy, sticky seaweed that made swimming an interesting experience. Luckily, midway through our week stay, the seaweed cleared and we were able to witness some of that heavenly turquoise waters.
Lukas did not like the seaweed at all. He insisted on staying out of the "yucky" water. He tolerated the daily beach trips. But most impressive was how well he dealt with both the long road trip there and back. He was absolutely awesome.
Not as well behaved on the road was my big baby C. :-) Cristian had already made the exact same long trip to the exact same destination with his father a few weeks earlier this summer. Cris was less than thrilled to make the trip once again with us and his moaning & groaning on the way there was his way of expressing his feelings. Once in our rental home however, he was more like himself. We teased him about how much better behaved Lukas was on the trip, and miraculously C  didn't complain at all on our drive back home to Texas.
I really hope we get the opportunity to do this again -- even if not in Florida.
Lukas isn't sure he wants to go into the water:

The green "yuck" was everywhere:

The Lukster decides to wet his feet...but only with his shoes on:

He's not thrilled, but he's not complaining either:

C takes a cruises the area via parasail w/ his aunt and cousin:

This was how most mornings started: JP on the computer and little man with his video player:

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Quality time on Father's Day

Lukas & JP had a nice moment playing an online videogame. Correction: Juan played while LP cheered on and provided an additional soundtrack. Happy Father's Day to an amazing, loving and generous dad...my swetie JP.

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Lukas plays air guitar...

(Note: 2nd video below)

On our way to San Antonio both Lukas and I made the most of our time in our respective back seats by "dancing" and "singing". Suddenly, LP decided to throw in a little air guitar. I appreciate that he was feeling out which hand is best to play his guitar.

Below, on a second clip, he gets VERY creative with a quick cris-cross ... and then a yawn.

happy mother's day

Gorgeous tulips, scrumptious fresh homemade blueberry pancakes & eggs for breakfast and an early movie with my boys --- and that's just how my day started! I feel incredibly blessed.

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Lukas' crush

Miss Marissa and a very shy LP:

eat your heart out...

C made a feast of bacon on Mother's Day eve...everything was absolutely delicious. And though one bacon burger undid a week's effort of workouts (and perhaps succeeded in clogging a few arteries), the meal was yummy...and made me super happy.

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Happy Cinco de Mayo

I've never wished anyone a Happy Cinco de Mayo, but how can I not when my nephew Enzo makes such a great little mexican:

lukas and a board

We went to the outlet mall in San Marcos to get a pair of shoes for the wee man & we stumbled into Zumies. Lukas fell in love with a couple of long boards there including this first of many he test drove: (sorry for the angle... I'm still getting use to the video camera on my phone).

The BEST part of the video, in my opinion, is at the very end when LP stretches out his arms from the pride he feels after the "ride" (as pictured above).

How well we love.. that's what really matters

I had to use this picture. Not because it is current —because it's not; it was taken back in January 2007— but because I thought it captured so well President Obama's vision of how we should see our children: "So curious, so trusting, so energetic and full of magic. So deserving of our love."

Last night, President Obama’s speech at the Tucson memorial moved me.

In his speech I found reminders that were not only appropriate for the current state of politics in this country, but also reminders of the course I need to stay on to be a better a mother, wife... better person.

President Obama said:
“These men and women remind us that heroism is found not only on the fields of battle. They remind us that heroism does not require special training or physical strength. Heroism is here, all around us, in the hearts of so many of our fellow citizens, just waiting to be summoned – as it was on Saturday morning.”

“We recognize our own mortality, and are reminded that in the fleeting time we have on this earth, what matters is not wealth, or status, or power, or fame – but rather, how well we have loved.”

“The loss of these wonderful people should make every one of us strive to be better in our private lives – to be better friends and neighbors, co-workers and parents.”
“May God bless and keep those we’ve lost in restful and eternal peace. May He love and watch over the survivors.”

God bless us all.

They grow so fast

UPDATE: Note to self: Do NOT post an entry from cell phone. This post reads so badly! :-)

My Eli is basically a man. Though he's only 17 and there's still so much for him to experience, I know he's on a good road to being an upstanding MAN.

Last night Juan and I were out at the Beauty Bar with our pals and Cris was home with two of his friends.

Before leaving on our date it hit me that Cris really is, as he says, "grown". As JP and I headed out of the driveway I had a flashback to the days when it was impossible for me to do much of anything without little C crying for me. Now he either joins me, or more often than not, he's more than happy to have mommy leave the house.

While this photo of Eli and his buddy Lindsey have nothing to do with last night, it is a picture of my handsome young man and one of his adorable friends (of which he has no short supply).

(I think what I was hoping to capture with this post from my cell was the reminder that my little boy is no longer a baby, but almost a man).

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1st trip of the year to Butler Park

We made our first trip to Butler Park this morning. Lukas had a blast. Jackson was exhausted. And the big people (Juan and I) just took it all in.

Here are some pics:

Looking back at 2010

Another year has gone by and with it a canvas of treasured moments created unforgettable memories for us.

Among the many wonderful things that occurred this year: Lukas turned 3, developed a passion for all things Superman, and expanded his vocabulary (which has been so much fun for all of us to witness). In true teenage fashion, Cristian got behind the wheel a lot more, let his hair grow longer than he ever has, and experienced his first Austin City Limits via a press pass. Juan continued to excel at work and once again participated in his NFL fantasy leagues (as did Cristian).

The year also contained some hard times for us including the loss of our pregnancy. As sad as this was, it was only a foreshadow to the most monumental news: I would no longer be able to bear another child. It was a difficult year in this regard, but overall it was an a very blessed and happy 2010.

Some of my favorites memories of 2010 were as follows:
1. Receiving a text from Vanesa (Lukas' teacher) to notify me that the wee man had gone potty.
2. Crisitan telling me he made co-editor of the year-book staff. Then later telling me he had chosen to instead take the helm of the newly created school paper as its editor-in-chief.
3. Dancing with and being held by Juan at Maneja Beto's send off gig at the Mohawk.
4. Watching Lukas climb onto his own bed to call it a night -- instead of sleeping with mommy and daddy.
5. Singing and laughing with Cristian all the way home on our drive from Dallas.
6. Watching Cristian "command" his news staff at a football game at House Park Field.
7. Watching Lukas paint and learning that painting really calms him.
8. The "She just started crying" Cristian moment at Burger Stadium.
9. Lukas becoming a great little photographer!
10. Laying in bed late on Dec. 30th recounting with Juan our favorite moments of 2010 -- and in our life together.

And now that we're done looking back...it's time to focus on all the blessings and great times that 2011 has in store for us!!!

HAPPY NEW YEAR EVERYONE!!!

17 years ago today....

... I was sitting in one of my journalism classes at the University of Texas at Arlington with a round belly, taking a mid-term exam when I suddenly went into labor. I finished the test and drove myself back to Dallas. Many hours later (many, many, many hours later) my beautiful child was born at Parkland Hospital.

At 6:55 p.m., Thursday, November 4, 1993 Cristian Elijah SantaCruz Reynoso came into the world weighing in at 8 lbs. 1.2 ounces and measuring 21 1/2 inches long.

It was a difficult delivery in which both my life and his were at serious risk. Neither one of us gave up. Though the birth was natural and free of drugs, I was heavily medicated after the baby's arrival meaning I wouldn't be able to hold my newborn until the doctors felt it was safe for me to do so.

A day had passed and I still hadn't seen my baby boy so I asked to be wheeled to the nursery so that I could see and hold him. When I arrived he was snuggled in the nurse's arm, drinking a bottle. She told me he was a very good and calm baby, that he was doing well and placed him in my arms. He was amazing!

The next day I was eager to once again feel his warmth. In two days since his arrival my bundle of joy had yet to make a personal appearance in my room.

I'd watched the girl who shared my room feed and hold her baby girl -- and even watched the two sleep. But I couldn't do the same with mine.

On the second day after his birth, I heard a small cry outside my room door and down the hallway. I told my roommate,"That's my baby!". But she kindly said that I was just missing my baby, to calm down and wait for the nurse to tell me when I'd get to see my son again. But I thought, "this girl has no idea what she is saying!". The cry outside —though I'd never heard before— was MY cry. I knew from the depth of my soul this was a cry I'd heard in my dreams.

I got out of bed, walked out to the hallway and saw a wheeled-tray of four or so babies. Only one was crying. As I approached them, my heart beat stronger. I got near the baby that was crying and saw his hospital band on his small foot. It read: SantaCruz boy. He was mine!!!

A nurse quickly reappeared and asked me to return to my room, and I did. I waited patiently, happily for my little critter. But I never forgot that moment that has forever captured what our relationship would be: an unbelievable, unbreakable and magical bond.

Today, my baby boy is a young man full of talent and possibilities.

He's strong, gentle, witty, smart and brave.

He's done all that I'd hope he'd do so far -- and a lot more that he's hoped for himself and achieved all on his own.

He often surprises me. Yet I can never stop worrying.

I know that I'm a better person because of him.

Happy birthday Nene!

Cristian with the band, Portugal the Man at ACL 2010.


Cristian with buddy Marrisa Camarillo (love her!)


One of Cristian's doodles:


Me and my baby!


C:

Lukas the photog

Click here to view these pictures larger

The wee man is three

I can't believe it's been three whole years. But the candles on the cake don't lie.

As I sit here on the eve of my baby boy's birthday and look at the photo above of him at the tender age of 1 month-old, my mind drifts to five years ago when I thought I could never love another child with the same intensity and immediacy that I felt for Cristian.

I use to look at parents with more than one child and wonder how they succeeded to love more than one child as much as I loved my one and only. In my mind, it seemed impossible to have so much emotion to share with multiple children. Surely, I thought, parents weren't honest when they said they loved their children equally.

But on September 26, 2007 I learned what so many parents knew before me: the love of a mother is limitless and it grows beyond imagination. As was the case when I first heard Cristian's cry so many years before, I instantly fell in love with Lukas when my eyes first fell upon him -- bloody, messy, wrinkly and all.

It's amazing to have this little person's laughter fill the house with so much happiness; or that his explorations can quickly replace a tired frown into a genuine smile of gratitude (a smile that thanks God and the Universe for allowing us such a miracle).

Unlike his brother, this wee one is feisty. He is the living definition of a "terrible two", and maybe even a "terrible three" (keep your fingers crossed for us that he isn't). And yet, he is at the same time sweet and adorable with his convictions. I know that he will be a great kid, a neat pre-teen, an awesome teen and an incredible man, just like his big brother.

I know that those stages will quickly come and go. For now, I hold tight to his toddler years as though they are the last drink of water on a lifeboat surrounded by only ocean. I know that I will someday be thirsty for these days again, and unless I take them in slowly, I'll miss them all.

Instead of missing them, I embrace each passing moment. I cherish the fact that even though he'll be three, my little tyke still refuses to use the potty. Yep. That's right. Mr. Lukas is still not potty trained (anyone with suggestions/advice are welcomed to share such precious knowledge below).

What makes up for little frustrations like the potty-less wonder and the still occasional tantrums? His smile; his laughter; the way he says,"Mommy, look at me!" with such pride; the way he likes to wear his daddy's shoes around the house, even though they're more likely to trip him than help him; the way he adores his big brother; the way he searches to touch my face before falling asleep; the way he says, "I love you mommy".

I wouldn't change a thing about my little Lukas, even when he's been a terrible two.

So, while I will most definitely wish the wee man a happy birthday on his special day, I will also take a moment to thank God for granting me the honor to raise two beautiful boys, including this gorgeous hippie-hair child of mine!


Here's the little guy being a little trouble maker, making daddy chase him after "stealing" daddy's cap! (He kept running so fast, I can't believe I even got this picture... but it's one of my faves)



Lukas loves being tossed up in the air:



Below are two pictures of Lukas taken in June during a visit to his favorite place: Zilker Park.

Peace...

Peace: it’s a loaded word; a loaded concept; and from the looks of this world, an unattainable philosophy.

What brings me to even talk about such a word? Well, the other day, I received a tweet that said something to the effect of, “let peace fill your thoughts today”…. or something along those lines.

Being a perpetual student of life, I chose to immediately put those wise words into practice. I began thinking of peaceful places; peaceful images; peaceful people… and as often occurs when I start to think, my thoughts took on a life of their own, and suddenly they stopped dead in their tracks when they came across the phrase: “All is fair in love and war”.

I stopped; let the words really take form and I then began to feel sick.

All I could do was ask: “Really? Who was the idiot who coined this idiom?”

No wonder our world is in such turmoil.

To suggest that it is “honorable” or “in your right” to be manipulative, deceitful, and just plain rotten in the name of love, country or faith is counter to the ideas of humanity, patriotism and religion, in my opinion.

Why would anyone believe in a God who asked people to treat their neighbor unfairly?

Why would anyone trust in a land led by men who can’t see the right for all men to live life with dignity?

Why would anyone accept in their lives someone who gave them a foundation of lies?

For me, stumbling across this phrase made me realize that this is exactly what I don’t want to teach my children.

Instead, I want them to have the tools to be a part of a group that sees pride in country as taking care of its countrymen; to a accept that our God is a God who loves unconditionally; and I want to make sure that when they choose their life mate, it is because that person will honor and love them in return.

The sick get weary

This week has been pretty tiring. I was out most of the week taking care of the little one. Lukas had pneumonia along with two ear infections. Needless to say, he wasn't a happy camper.

So, what was the upside to this week, at least for me? I'm finally "mommy". Though Lukas on occasion still calls me "G" (a name he apparently thought was appropriate for ALL moms), he mostly calls me mommy now. YAY.

Along with mommy, Lukas has developed an extensive vocabulary, and bilingual at that. It's really cute to hear him repeat something in Spanish if he feels you didn't understand him in English the first few times he wants something, like a bath at 3 p.m. on a Saturday afternoon.

As for Cristian: he had a very bumpy start of the school year - and while it's not as pretty as I'd like it to be for him, this semester he seems to be doing better. Let's just hope he finds that rhythm to get back where we all know he needs to be.

Proudest moment so far: his choosing to drop football for a journalism class -- one in which, I may add, that he is exceeding.

For the moment, here's a snapshot of Lukas taken by his teacher at school last month: